She is a strong, intelligent, caring woman. But right now, I'd like to kill her.
She sent me marshmallow Peeps for Easter.
2 GIANT packages.
I've almost destroyed one already.
My name is Sam, and I'm addicted to sugar.
I purposefully do not buy sweets because if they enter this house it's ALL I think about until it's gone.
You know those people who buy a candy bar and eat half of it and stick in the fridge? Yeah, I loath you. I've attempted it and it's like something out of a Poe short story.
I hear the thing in the fridge saying "EAT ME... EAT ME NOW" and I often listen to sugary treats with a menacing voice.
I think I'll donate the last package to... some grad students or maybe that dude near the Waffle House that walks around with a sleeping bag.
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